Hand Me Down

Why in certain situations, do hands become the most awkward thing in the world to have?? Honestly, I don't get it. Most of the time my hands and I exist in complete harmony and I never really think about them too much. They get on with the job of doing what I need them to do without much of a conscious effort from my good self. Then BAM! all of a sudden I find myself in a pressure situation, like, I don't know, an interview or a 6 month, 9 month or 12 month review at work and suddenly I have a heightened awareness of my hands and I have no idea what I'm suppose to do with them. Yes, in the blink of an eye my hands have gone from being my allie to my enemy. While I sit/stand there and try to give the appearance of cool, calm and collected, my hands are cooking up a plan of sabotage, drawing attention to themselves and making me look awkward and self conscious.


So what should I do, cross them? Bad idea, gives the impression of guarded, hostility or attitude.
How about I put them in my pocket? You know, like I'm just chillin and everything is cool. But no pockets in this skirt. Damn it.
Something to hold. A pen, a file, a phone, a bottle of water, something, anything, seriously, I need my hands to stop looking and feeling like foreign objects. They're exposing my inner turmoil and making me look like all kinds of negative.


Hands need to get onboard and start pulling together as a team. Separating themselves and behaving in an erratic, random and unfocused manner is just making me look insecure and guilty of something.